Friday, June 09, 2006

Sure the country's going to hell...

But we gotta keep gays from gettin' married.

Yep, we're stuck in an ongoing war that was waged under suspicious circumstances with no end in sight, and the American people are jumping off the "War on Terror" bandwagon quicker than rats off the Titanic...but we gotta keep those queers from tossin' the bouquet.

Yeah, we're raising a bunch of overweight computer and Internet obsessed kids who's parents coddle them from all adversity and have the lawfirm of Dewey Cheatham and Howe on speeddial whenever their widdle angels get their feelings hurt because of getting cut from the (insert high school sport here) team...but we gotta keep the light in the loafer crowd from tying the knot.

Yeah, we have an Everest sized budget deficit that's going to be passed on to our children, and their children, and their children, ad nauseaum...but we gotta keep those fudge-packers from jumpin' the broomstick.

Yep, the President has an approval rating lower than whale shit at the bottom of the Mariana Trench, and Congress's approval rating is floating somewhere around the earth's core...but we gotta keep the fags from saying "I do"

Yeah, we got illegal aliens coming over the border in droves and no idea what to do with them...but we gotta keep them booty-holers from " goin to the chapel"

Yep, we got drugs in the heartland, gangs in middle America, heroin in suburbia...but we gotta keep the ass-pirates from getting hitched.

Of course, the environment is going into the crapper, developers are paving over the landscape like no tomorrow, and we're trying like hell to keep our 10 gallons per mile Mammoth Motors Ginormous 2000 SUV's while still paying $3.00 for a gallon of unleaded...but we gotta keep the homos from walking the aisle.

Yeah, The gap between rich and poor, white and black has never been wider. Since 9/11 our country's liberties have been thrown to the scrap heap in the name of national security and the War on Terrror...but we gotta keep them fruit cakes from becoming "Mister and Mister." ( or Mrs and Mrs.)

Our kids are graduating from schools barely able to read and write, they are falling behind the rest of the world in science and math, but they can play Grand Theft Auto like nobody's business!...and we gotta keep them fruit cakes from become a couple.

Society is ruder, nastier, and more pissed off than ever before. Manners are going out the window. Copping an attitude is cool... but we gotta keep the lesbos, lovely boys, shemales and switchitters from doing the "wedding thing"

We need to make sure our priorities are straight. We can't afford to be going off on a tangent these days.

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